Tuesday, May 31, 2016

On my own.....

All by myself. One woman show. Me, myself and I. Whatever you want to call it.

Since the first time since my transplant my final steps in recovery are all mine.

No Therapists. No buddies. No one poking me along. Now it is really just me and my personal motivation.  I recently read a book recomended to me by a friend called "Looking for Lovely" this is a very insightful and spiritual book. In the book, the author Annie speaks of her own personal experiences with quitting in her life. I have quit and restarted many things including keeping up this blog, but my personal regrowth is something I don't want to quit. Not after I have came this far.

As I look for my own personal lovely, I am trying to dig deep and not slip back into the old ways. Waking in to the Y today I challenged my self to follow the regime that my PT Meghan had taught me and we had done together so often. Me in the water, her on the side encouraging me. It wasn't easy, it's not suppose to be and I know that. It felt great. I felt accomplished and happily walked out with my head held high and a smile on my face. I even took a second to stick my head into to rehab.....I don't easily let go of old friends, thats how I roll.

Taking pictures in a mirror is not my thing, but taking this one was something I felt I needed to do because it was another one of those first time moments.

First time knowing that Meghan or Adrianne would not be there waiting for me. The first time I wouldn't use my rehab card to enter the rehab pool. The first time I would not be able to have someone there laughing and chatting our about weekends, keeping my mind from thinking about the hard work and focusing on just moving. So with Meghan's list in hand and the tools of the Y she trained me to use,  I am armed with what I need to succeed.




Thursday, March 17, 2016

Am I back....

I am not sure. Hard to say but here I am.  I got to thinking today about my life a year ago and how different it is. It blows my mind. Many people ask me. If you would have known what you were up against what would you have done. I would have done the same thing, which could make some question my sanity. Maybe it my medication or maybe it's just simply the lessons I've learned.

First lesson after a tramadic almost life ending experience: The small things do matter. Yes yes, I know. It seems kleshea but it's so true. Life really blows when you can't....
tie your own shoes
hook your bra
put your shirt on
pull up your pants
wash dishes
wash your hair
wipe your rear
type
get in a car
ride a four wheeler
cook
do laundry
lift a gallon of milk
buckle your seat belt
drive
or
or
or
or
or
or.....
WALK

Lesson 2. Drs do not suck. They are not the enemy. They are not to be feared. God gave them a natural talent and we are all so lucky to be able to benefit from their talent and knowledge. I have an amazing team of Doctors and specialists who played a major role in saving my life.

Lesson 3. It may surprise you when your sick who really comes to your aide and who runs the other way. I mean like tears off with their shorts on fire.

Lesson 4. Being an Non-drinker is NOT the end of the world. That's right. Waking up and saying what kind of a** can I kick today is much more fun they saying "How am I going to get this trough this horribly long day".

Thats it for now. I have many many more lessons, but this is my mushing for today the 17th of the month. The number of the month that will always be the day. 10 months since my transplant. 10 whole months of lessons learned. I am sure without a doubt their will be more!

Nothing makes Transplant day better than loves from my Doggie........



Thursday, December 17, 2015

The neglected posts and absence of attention to this blog....there is a valid reason. Many of you who visit this blog in the next few days and weeks may have been driven here by a post in our Christmas card to visit. Some of you are  returning as old friends to a blog I loved to update. However It has sat silent for an extended amount of time. I could list excuses. Share technical challenges but I prefer the truth. Plain and simple my reason for keeping the blog, my lust for recording life was gone. My lust for a lot if things I loved had taken a backseat to an impending feeling of personal gloom. Not really what you had in mind for a holiday greeting I am thinking but again it is the truth. I remember the day I knew I had enough. I was sitting at a Nebraska football game with me Sister-in-law Kris and telling her how crappy I had been feeling. Yes I used crappy in my "holiday greeting". Crappy is the nice pleasant publishable word.

The abbreviated version of this year will as usual give you a small recap of a year in our lives. There was a small trip to Sunny Phoenix last January with friends on business and pleasure. I wish I could say I had a lovely trip. Not being one to share gloom and doom but again being honest. I was miserable. I felt sick. I was sick of being sick and tired. The straw that broke the camels back was the Lindsay Holy Family fun night at which Mark and Ron were the auctioneers for the evening as Mark had done so many times. I noticed a shirt that I had wore around the holidays was fitting tight and my tummy was protruding. Then all hell broke lose. Yes hell. I will use it because that was what was about to break lose.



We conducted an auction by Hastings Nebraska. The following day I was scheduled to have a Dr appointment with my general Practicioner Dr Zaruba. People who know me know I was never particularly fond of Doctors, so Ron went with me. Before I knew it I was in the Colunbus Community Hospital emergency room on the insistent urging of Dr and his Nurse Sandy who we credit for ultimately saving me life. Such would begin a journey to save my life in the roughest Road trip to Omaha for my extended stay at the University of Nebraska  Medical Center Hotel, night club and day spa..



Here's where I might have to abbreviate things a bit. Things went from crappy to the pits of hell. Things got real real fast. I went from the happy go lucky hard working fun loving girl to a battle tested life fighting Ninja. The big medical words I heard sort of made sense but hearing your liver is failing and to save your life you need a transplant sent me into survival mode. I was not going to let the liver win. I was going to win, come hell or high water....which ironically spring was extremely wet and  floody most of which I watched out of my window on the seventh floor of UNMC.



As most of you have probably figured out by now or witnessed in person, I did get on the transplant list and on May 17, 2015 Ron and I were introduced to our new friend, Leroy the liver. Our new friend was healthy, strong and was just what the Dr ordered Litterally. When I was trying how sum up this year I contemplated this version. I got sick. I almost died. I got a transplant. Merry Christmas. However I obviously changed my mind. After an eternity at Club UNMC Ron, Leroy and I were headed home to Cheerio and what would be the longest, hardest a summer of my life and our climb out of the pit of hell.



Fast forward 6 months later and here we are. It's the middle of the night and I am pouring over the last year in my mind thinking, what just happened and as soon as I find that bus that hit me....I am going to stop it and thank it. Yes thank it for giving me the ride of my life and taught me just the kind of person I truly am....

Happy Holidays to one and all and here's to a great 2015. My greatest blessing of this year beside my friend Leroy and his old friend my donor is one Mr Ronnie boy Stock. You could call us the dream team, the nut truck or the hellovator Warriors. I call us.....

The perfect pair.


Monday, June 30, 2014

Realities

Today, when Ron and I got home from Stockfest 2014, (our annual Stock family trip) in between laundry and unpacking, I decided to do my usual checking up on Facebook for the day. I ran across a picture from the Pilger, Nebraska Tornado clean-up that really hit home to me. My Friend Rachel and I volunteered to assist with Cleanup on the 19th of June, just four short days after the Tornado hit. The photo below was taken by Rachel as we were leaving town. The other photo is one she took emphasizing the fact that the house next door was so badly damaged yet the tree house was completely intact. 



 This is a photo I found from a gentleman who had toured Pilger this past weekend. This is the same house. What struck me was that the house next door has already been removed has everything across the street to the North. Just makes me sad.
The loss these people have suffered is barely comprehendible to me. The thought of losing everything in a matter of seconds seems like something out of a movie UNTIL you actually find yourself digging through boards, trees, sheet rock, wires and endless stuff trying to find something/anything someone could salvage.

People say I am crazy for watching storms, or am I? As the old saying goes when it's your time it's your time, or is it. Sometimes in these situations we really must take a few seconds to protect ourselves and our families, so matter how pointless people make think it seems.

Tuesday, May 6, 2014

Finally a computer back.......

so I can blog. Even though my precious photos are still in limbo. I am finding a few that I promised myself I would save on my blog, just to make sure. I have wanted to blog for four months and without a computer......not an easy task......

Like this cute little picture of my Nephew Sheldon and I having ice cream in Galveston after my Nephew Seth's wedding. I am sure this came off my phone, so I am still praying for those camera photos.

OR.....

Finding a photo from our Godson Eric's First Communion.

OR......


A picture of me and my beautiful Niece Alicia at her wedding.

OR.......


Kind of family photo from Seth's Wedding......two tables of us.

Right now the rescue of the rest of photos is not certain. I WILL NEVER again not back up these photos that are so important to me. Breaks my heart to think of losing any of them. Lesson learned...........

Thursday, December 26, 2013

Happy Boxing Day

My Third Boxing day party at Duncan Lakes....success. Who knows what Boxing day means: Boxing Day is traditionally the day following Christmas Day, when servants and tradesmen would receive gifts, known as a "Christmas box", from their bosses or employers. It is observed in the United Kingdom, Canada, Hong Kong, Australia, New Zealand, Kenya, South Africa, Trinidad and Tobago and other Commonwealth nations.....and NEBRASKA

Darn Shaved Ham, or Ham and shaves, or shaved duck, or sinking duck, or Shaved Rabbit, or drunken Rats, or Sunken Rats....


God Bless us everyone :) 

Thursday, December 19, 2013

Today has been one...

of those days. Where things just don't mesh.

Starting off my day hearing news about Phil Robertson being banned from Duck Dynasty for comments he made to GQ. Made me mad as hell. I love Duck Dynasty, some people love the show some people hate it. Here's my take. You might like Survivor, or Dancing with the Stars or the Amazing race...me not at all, but don't go all postal on me because I like something you don't. I don't get that. WHY? I support Phil 100% and I love the Robertson's. Their Christian values inspire me and I will always love the Robertson's!!!!



I was going to go into Duncan tonight to a Christmas party, but chose to stay all safe and sound at our cabin because the wind was making it so cold out. No to mention I really wanted to watch the NCAA Volleyball Semi's. ENJOYED the Wisconsin Badgers vs Texas game. WAY TO KNOCK OF THE NUMBER ONE TEAM Badgers. I swear Texas gets into Nebraska's heads when we play Volleyball. The girls lost to Texas last Saturday night for their chance to play in Seattle :( Horns down!!!

I just adore my little Christmas trees at our Duncan house. There's something about it. I have ice skates, sleds, pine cones, jingle bell wreaths, snowflakes, gingerbread men, lanterns, snowmen galore and I love it! I also have these adorable winter mitten ornaments that I have never seen again. Then there are my cute little stuffed girl and boy Snowmen :) Just FYI, all those presents belong to Ron and Cheerio :)


Then my dear sweet husband sent me text that he would like some photos of me and Cheerio. He is in Kansas and I can't believe I actually got Cheerio to take photos with me :)